BEN & JERRY’S CHOCOLATE FUDGE BROWNIE NON-DAIRY ICE CREAM – MAKING VEGANISM RADICAL AGAIN

Hi, Pathetically

“Make veganism radical again.” That’s what a friend of mine posted on Instagram. Followed by a photo of him sitting, smugly, in a hip vegan restaurant, eating a gourmet, plant-based hotdog with some hip vegan buddies. All good. What is making veganism radical again, however, is Ben & Jerry’s new range of non-dairy ice creams.

Netflix and chill – with a frozen tub of Ben & Jerry’s, of course – had become a thing of the past. An old indulgence I’d all but forgotten. A dream I’d just about relinquished. That was, until I spotted a tub of Ben & Jerry’s Chocolate Fudge Brownie Non-Dairy Ice Cream in my local ASDA. Radical.

I know I say this a lot but I really could not believe my luck. To me, the non-dairy version of the classic Ben & Jerry’s flavour tastes even better than the real thing. There’s just something about it. The flavours are richer. The chocolate’s more decadent. And the ice cream’s even more luxurious. Somehow, it tastes more small batch. More-carefully put together. Like Ben and Jerry actually have something to prove again. It’s irresistible.

I’ve tried the vegan Peanut Butter & Cookies vanilla ice cream option as well. And it’s just as good as its non-dairy counterparts. But if you’re anything like me, It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia is way more enjoyable with a tub of chocolate, fudge and brownie-based ice cream and a big spoon. Now I’m on the lookout for the latest addition to the vegan range, the gorgeous-sounding caramel number, Cookies On Cookie Dough. Remember vegan kids; don’t give up on your plant-based dreams.

NOMO VEGAN CHOCOLATE – DAIRY-FREE SUPERMARKET CHOCOLATE FINALLY GETS CREAMY (AND DREAMY)

Hi, Pathetically

The shelves of my local ASDA seem to be going through a lowkey vegan renaissance at the moment. And it’s pretty exciting. First there was Kings Veggie Jerky. Then Jealous Sweets. And now I’ve spotted NOMO vegan chocolate. Truth is, it’s getting easier and easier to be vegan every day.

Generally, vegan supermarket chocolate options include Cadbury’s Bournville and whatever’s in the Free From aisle. And if you’re looking for something creamy, forget about it. It’s dark. It’s soy-based. And it’s average. If you want something dreamy you need to go to Holland & Barrett and pick up a bar (or two) of Vego Whole Hazelnut. Well, vegan friends. No more.

NOMO, or No Missing Out, vegan chocolate is made by U.K. confectioner Kinnerton. And it’s the real thing. Creamy. High-quality. And soy-free. Except the dark chocolate option. But that’s not what we’re after, right? We want soft, velvety and luxurious. And that’s exactly what NOMO brings to the table. Or bus. Or park bench. Or pavement.

So far I’ve tried the Creamy Choc bar, which reminds me of a Beacon Inside Story Delectable Truffle – it’s that creamy. And I’ve had the Caramel and Sea Salt option, which is my favourite, and reminds me of a more artisanal-tasting, less-saccharine Cadbury’s Dairy Milk Caramel.

You hear (and see) the words “game changer” thrown around so often they’ve lost all meaning. But if you’re vegan, and you’ve got a sweet tooth, and you’re tired of the boring, bland, dark chocolate options in your local Free From aisle, look out for NOMO vegan chocolate. It’s a game changer.

FOLLOW YOUR HEART BLEU CHEESE DRESSING – WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE (AND VEGAN)

Hi, Pathetically

What a time to be alive. When I can buy vegan blue cheese dressing at my local Embas Express. If you’ve been following my vegan supermarket posts, you’ll know that I’m a fan of Follow Your Heart’s range of vegan mayo. But the company’s High Omega Vegan Bleu Cheese Dressing takes Vegenaise to a whole new dimension.

Somehow, those solar powered magicians at Follow Your Heart have recreated the strong, magical taste and creamy luxuriousness of regular blue cheese dressing. Only they’ve done it with Vegenaise, and ingredients like apple cider vinegar, cold-pressed hemp seed oil, cold-pressed flaxseed oil and soy protein.

It’s mesmerising. Pure wizardry. If you could travel back to 2005 and put this shit on a vegan’s salad or falafel, it would blow their tiny, hummus-clogged mind. They’d never have seen it coming. I didn’t see it coming. I mean, I’ve had convincing blue cheese dressing at vegan burger joints before. But not my own bottle. On tap. In the fridge. Ready to pour on anything…

TESCO VEGAN JALAPENO & CHILLI CHEDDAR – TANGY COCONUT OIL ALTERNATIVE TO SPICE UP YOUR LIFE

Hi, Pathetically

Look, we all know a lot of supermarket vegan cheese is garbage. Especially when it comes to supermarket own brands. It’s a learning curve. And while Tesco’s litigation-dodging “Free From Coconut Oil Alternative to Jalapeno and Chilli Cheddar” is no I AM NUT OKAY, or Black Arts Vegan, it’s 100% tasty melted on a slice of toast or in a grilled cheese sandwich.

I always used to like spicy cheddar more than the real thing. It’s the lingering kick, I guess, that adds to the otherwise simplistic flavour. But the coconut oil cheese, itself, is firmer and tastier than other similar supermarket alternatives I’ve tried as well. It’s more like actual cheddar. Especially melted – the improved state of being for most supermarket vegan cheese.

You might not bring it out on a board with a bunch of figs and some perfectly paired wine. But it is tasty. And super convenient, if you want some easy, supermarket cheddar to melt into the gaping cheese-shaped hole in your vegan life.

JUST LOVE VEGAN CHOCOLATE CAKE – SUPERMARKET CAKE DEFIES THE ODDS. IT’S MOIST

Hi, Pathetically

To be honest, I wasn’t expecting much from my Just Love Vegan Chocolate Cake. I saw someone post about it on Instagram. That they’d found it in Asda and it was tasty. And convenient baked goods are still very much a niche market in the vegan world. So I looked for it and found it in my local and here we are.

I was just after a bit of dry supermarket cake, really, to eat with my coffee. But the Just Love Food Company totally exceeded expectations. Because unlike every other cheap supermarket cake in the universe, this one’s moist. It’s like supermarket cake. Only well made. Nothing fancy. It justs tastes like whoever created it was anxious not to disappoint.

There are no dry wedges to endure until you get to the ultimately lacklustre frosting at the end. Instead, every bite’s as delicious as the next. The chocolate sponge is fluffy and rich. The chocolate frosting is generous and decadent. And the “lustered” dark chocolate drops are a 2019 one-up on the supermarket cake sprinkles I grew up eating.

KIRSTY’S CLASSIC MARGHERITA – THE NO-FRILLS FROZEN VEGAN PIZZA YOU’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR

kirtsys vegan pizza
Hi, Pathetically

Fuck falafel. Fuck artichoke. Fuck onion. Sometimes you just want a frozen pizza with some cheese on it. Something easy, that you can stick in the oven at the end of a long day. That doesn’t taste like feet. And so far, Kirsty’s Classic Margherita is the best frozen vegan-friendly supermarket pizza I’ve stumbled across.

Kirsty’s was started by “Lancashire mum” – and 2010 Dragon’s Den contestant – Kirsty Henshaw. Inspired by her son’s allergies and intolerances, Kirsty decided to start her own “healthy” free-from chilled and frozen food empire. But so far, I’ve only found her pizza in a few big Tescos. In the frozen vegetarian / vegan sections.

To be honest, it’s a good frozen pizza. Period. Tasty. Simple. To the point. And for a vegan pizza, it really doesn’t feel like anything’s missing on the classic, gooey margherita front. The base is thin and crispy. The tomato sauce is rich and tasty. And the cheese alternative is sticky and way more cowabunga than your average supermarket “free from” bullshit.

Looking at the list of ingredients, you’re not quite sure what to make of it. But then again. It’s a frozen pizza. It’s not organic kombucha. And ultimately, if you’re looking for Netflix and chilled, Kirsty’s delivers. Well, Tesco does. But seriously, go pick one up yourself.